Khlaudia

Potassia, darling, can you find Aunty Khandy for me?

ναι, μάνα,

Sometimes, I don't understand you dharling, just do what Mummy says

εντάξει

Did you find her dharling?

πέταξε μακριά

But the Kchicks?

πέταξαν μέσα κουβέρτα

Oh

άνδρας αρπακτικό πουλί ερχομός

Is khe? Oh khow lovely dharling, let's sit and wait for Mr Khevin then. Where is Khlimt?

παίξιμο συναλλαγή

Are you sure?

ναι, μάνα,

Dho you promise me dharling?

ναι, μάνα,

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the M42, it is humid, steamy even.

‘Oh Mister Khevin.. what lovely strong talons you have’

‘Oh, Khlaudia.. what..oh Khlauuudia...’

We return to a cosy nest on the M42

'Well, I must say they are most interesting photographs, especially the ones with the symbols in’
 
‘Ah, little Potassia as a kchick, she was so fluffy- see where kher little wing feathers are growing?’
 
‘And she is..?’
 
‘Looking at kher place in the periodic table silly’
 
‘And the one with the blue lights?’
 
‘That is little Khlimt on khis first flight, you can see Khant in the background, bekhind the man with the khelmet’
 
‘You must be very proud, mada.. Khlaudia’
 
‘I am darling, but I feel they need the influence of a father <theatrical sniff, rustle of feathery décolletage>’

 

M42, Clouds are scudding past

 © Copyright Michael Westley and licensed for reuse under this Creative Commons Licence

 

<sound of claw knocking respectfully on road sign>
‘Good morning madam?’
‘Ah good morning, Mr Khevin; do call me Khlaudia <flutter>’
‘And how are the kid <cough> khiddies this morning, madam..Klaud..Khlaudia?’
‘They are delightful, thank you Mr Khevin’
‘Is that them over there? ma..Khlaudia?’
‘Aren’t they just darling, darling? Look at their feathers in the light! Look as the sun khcatches their talons- I am such a proud mother, darling’
‘ What is it they are doing with that lorry Khlaudia?’
‘Oh just a little game, darling’
‘Ah I see, it is like what the roadkill people call dominos, very clever’
‘My darlings are very khlever darling, Can I offer you a little refreshment?’
‘Well, er that would be very..’
‘Khome into my nest darling....’

Morning on the M42, the sun is shining.

‘Khello darling’
‘Sorry miss?’
‘I said, khello darling’
<the unmistakable sound of low cut feathers>
‘ Ah, good morrning, er madam’
‘I khave not seen you khere before, darling, kwhat is your name, gorgeousssss?’
‘Kevin, madam. Is there something I can help you with?’
‘ Well now Mr Khevin, there is this terribly kheavy vole? I khave tried picking it up, but my talons are just too slender’
<sound of fluttering fluff>
‘Oh thank you Mr Khevin, you are adorable, you are the most <giggle> agile flier>
‘Thank you madam, there is no Mr. er..?’
‘Oh no darling, my Kelvin was lost in the Big Cold; I khave been managing all by myself, with my khiddies, since then’
‘Khiddies?’
“Aah yes, little Khlimt, Khant and Potassia’
‘ And you are, madam?’
‘I am Khlaudia darrrrling, soooo pleased to meet you,’’

Warwick

Kolin, what is Kev doing?'

'Search me, Kaspar'

<silence, and then the sound of wings struggling under a heavy load>

'Oh Kevin, not the PRAM, you are supposed to get the baby!!!!'